I need to update this more!!! Just a quick post of things I am looking forward today

Spring...

Graduation..

Easter

New Friends

Europe

New Job Possibilities..

Family time..

Sewing Projects...

just to name a few 

ugh...

I rarely do a negative post but I feel that is how this one is going to be.. Its ok if you skip reading this one but I think writing it will be good for me! 

I am super confused about life right now and what I am supposed to be doing. 

I have had some very clear answers to some big life decisions and all those things have completely fallen through.. It seems all the things in my life that I felt good about the past month have crumbled and now I feel alone and lost... 

Everyone keeps telling me to be positive and that everything will work out.. 

I really am trying but its starting to get hard.. 

I know that my trails right now are small when compared to many others but to be I am feeling very overwhelmed and frustrated.. 

I think I am generally a more positive person so I hate this right now.. I hate looking forward to good things right no because everything I do look forward to falls through.. I feel as though I have been on a huge losing streak for a while..

Kelly broke up with me... 

People who I thought were friends are not...

Housing keeps falling though..

I've been lied too

Talked about...

I feel betrayed by a few people..

and I could go on but that's not fun to read..

I do know that things will turn out and I'll be ok but life is hard right now... I just need a small answer to something. Just one thing to work out... 

Sorry that this was a negative post... I could go into detail about everything but I am done with crying for today! 

I promise the next post will be more positive!!

These past few weeks I have been thinking a lot about a few things.. I few weeks ago I went to the temple to do a session. However the session was too full so they split us into two groups. I decided to go do initiatorys. While I was there I was listening and one thing really stuck out to me. I really liked how we shouldn't speak guile.

I really don't consider myself a mean person, but tend to get annoyed and complain about things people do that really are not a big deal.

For me its pretty easy not to sit and talk about the negative aspects of a person.

But I still do complain about things.. a roommate who has left dishes in a sink.. a friend who has been grumpy... maybe someone didn't invite me to something..

plans fell through... anyways you get the picture...

So the past few weeks I have tried not to speak guile..

The past few weeks people have annoyed me way more than usual!

I was far from perfect on this but it is something I will keep working on!

I love dating someone who truly inspires me to be better..

Kelly is one of the nicest people I know, he always has good things to say about everyone and rarely ever says anything negative!

Here is to a new week and trying to keep those mean things I want to say in!

Hopefully by not saying anything rude will make it so I don't think mean things either!!

2011

I can't believe 2011 is almost over! Just a week left!

It has been a good year so much has happened

There have been lessons learned.. tears cried...trips... lots of laughter..new friends

Here is my year in a recap!

January: After welcoming in the new year with great friend my year started out great!

February: Work and school seemed to keep me busy!

March: More work and school! I am sure I played too but I can't remember specific things!

April: I went to LA and Vegas with Mandy! Super fun trip!!

May: Disneyland with Aimee, Michelle, and Cameron! Perfect weekend get away!

June: I started dating Skyler.. Went to Washington with Beccah! Went to Yellowstone..

July: I had my first clinic experience with school.. It was fun meeting all the girls from my program!

August: Finished the summer clinic...started back to work and school.. A weekend trip with the branch to Darby..

September: Broke up with Skyler..

October: Had a great Halloween, we dressed up as Mario Character's.

November: Started dating Kelly :) Had an amazing Thanksgiving. I also got a cute little nephew! I love you Jaxon!

December: Went to LA to see WICKED! with Kelly, Aimee, Edson, Mandy, Amanda, and Mike

It was so fun!

I am looking forward to spending the holidays with Kelly and our families!

I have been blessed so much this year!

I look forward to seeing what 2012 brings!

Day 4

I am so thankful for my ADORABLE niece and nephews!!

I love them more than anything!

Here is the newest one! Born just a few hours ago!

Jaxon Reed...

I am already in love with him!

Here is Jacie-bug...

This girl is my favorite girl in the entire world!

She makes me happy!

I think she is so fun and she just cracks me up!!

And Boe

LOVE this kid!

He has such a fun personality and just makes me smile!

These kids are all so fun and I seriously can't get enough of them!!

Day 3

Today I am thankful for my grandma!

Seriously she is one of the coolest people I know!

I love her!

She is one person that I know that will always be there for me no matter what!

I love it when I get text messages from her!

If you haven't met her, you should!!

Today my post is that I am thankful for ZUMBA!!

Seriously if you haven't tried it you need to do so!

It is tons of fun and a great workout!

I love how much of a stress reliever it is!

I have even lost weight doing it!

I used to wear a size 8 and now the last pair of pants I bought were a 4..

Anyways Maybe Zumba is weird to be thankful for but it is a blast!

I have been going 2-3 times a week and would recommend going to anyone!!

If you live around Idaho Falls Ashley Curry is amazing!

Welcome November!

Since it is November and Thanksgiving is coming soon I wanted to blog everyday about something I am thankful for..

Today I am thankful for the gospel...

I am so grateful for my membership in the

Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints..

I know that without a doubt that the gospel is what makes me happy.

It is my motivation in life.

I know that there is a bigger plan for me.

I know that I have a Savior who loves me..

and He knows me.

I know that all good things in my life come as a blessing from the gospel.

I am grateful for the testimony that I have..

I am grateful for a gospel that lifts me in hard times and makes my good times better..

I am grateful for a religion that teaches me what really is important in life..

Happy November!

Life is Hard

This week has been hard... Hard actually doesn't begin to describe the week..

I am not writing this to complain but to get thoughts out..

I have had so many thoughts and they only seem to make sense if I write them down

After what I thought was good.. Skyler and I broke up...

It was hard because I knew I was going to marry him..

There was not one part of my life that I couldn't see him in..

I am not sure about things now..

I know that he has been through hell the past year and has dealt with some incredibly hard things in his life.

I wish though that he could see who he is now, not who he was

He is incredible.. I wish I could tell him that..

I got a blessing Tuesday night..

These are the things that I know now

I know that my Savior is very aware of me and Skyler...

The Lord know that whatever happens will be best for both of us no matter what it is.

That Skyler DOES need time alone to figure things out..

He need to adjust to being home without trying to figure out a relationship and if I am even what he wants.

Skyler needs to realize that his past is exactly that and that I have never had one bad thought about him and I never will I know I don't know everything but I know who he is now and he needs to realize that he is a great guy..

I know it will take time for him to get back to normal life not just the week he has been home but time..

I am don't know what the future holds

I don't know if I will end up with Skyler..

I am not counting on it but I will be honest something in me keeps telling me its not over yet..

That might mean we are friends... It might mean we never talk again...

It might mean that in a few months we can try things again..

I honestly don't know

But I know I need to move on with life now

I need to do the things I am supposed to do

I need to date other people as much as a don't want too..

I don't doubt the promptings I have received regarding Skyler..

I don't doubt the things I was taught meeting with President Hansen and through the blessing I received..

I know that agency sucks sometimes and that things change....

I don't know what the future holds

But I do know that I will be ok no matter the outcome..

I know that Skyler will be ok

I pray that he can figure out the things he needs to for his happiness.

That no matter what we can be friends..

Maybe I do just need to move on and forget about him and what we had..

I don't know..

I know the questions and confusion I have will be answered in time and that things will end up how they are supposed to be..

I just am working on having the faith to move forward..

I can do hard things...

I will be here for Skyler as a friend when he needs it..

I am willing to date others and to open my heart to new relationships..

I am not closing the door to Skyler...

I am moving on with my life..

I am happy

I know its ok to miss him, he was my best friend...

I am willing to accept the Lord's will for me no matter what it is

I will be patient in all trails and learn what I can from them

I will forgive and forget the hurt I feel..

I will not lose hope or doubt things

I don't really know if I made sense at all but I felt better after writing it...

I don't know who will read this or what your opinions are

I don't know if you are with it or not but it is how I feel

It is what I think..

I still love Skyler and I do hope we can be friends..

Whatever else happens will only come out it time..

I can honestly say I know that I will be happy and will have a happy life no matter what happens..

Ok,, There is on more little thing that has happened! :)

In May I met Skyler..

Actually we had been talking online for a few months before.

Anyways, in May he came on on leave from the Army and we really hit it off!

He treats me so well! I think sometimes better than I deserve!

He will be home from Iraq in September, I can't wait!

Luckily we get to talk a lot!

Here are some of my favorite things about him

1) He treats me fantastic

2) He is sacrificing so much to server our country

3) He make me want to be a better person

4) He is caring and kind

5) He listens to me

6) He has awesome bowling skills! :)

7) Whenever I need him he is there..

8) He is motivated

9) He has a strong testimony of the Gospel

10) He is just fantastic!

The past few months

So much has happened these past few months since my last post!

In May Michelle, Aimee, Cameron, and I went to California!

We decided we needed a little break

to Disneyland!

Me, Michelle and Aimee

Cameron and Michelle in the teacup

Mickey's car

We had a lot of fun. We spent Friday night and Saturday at Disneyland and California Adventure. Sunday we attended church and then walked on the pier and beach.

Monday we came home.. It was a fun weekend trip!

Also, in May school got out! I can't believe it is already summer!

In June I went to Washington with Beccah..

It is one of my favorite places!

We spent a few days in Moses Lake with her grandparents then went to Vancouver to see her sister Sarah..

While in Vancouver we visited Tillamook and the Beach... Here are a few pics from that trip!

Also in June our branch went to Yellowstone... We had a lot of fun!

For school we started clinic. It has been busy but fun.. We have 4 1/2 weeks left!

Easter....

I will post pics this week of the fabulous Easter party at Aunt Marilyn's that was incredibly fun as usual!

But since today is Easter I thought I'd write more of my thought on that...

I am so grateful for a living Savior!

I have been talking to a few friends lately about the atonement...

What a wonderful thing that is!

What other power can completely change a life!

Today I was reading the account of the crucifixion in Luke..

I think the part that really struck me today was after Christ was on the cross..

One of the two men also being hung was mocking Christ..

Saying that if he really was Christ then h should save himself and them as well..

The other man being crucified rebuking the man tells him that they were indeed guilty but Christ was an innocent man.. Then asks Christ to remember him in His kingdom..

Christ's reply was simple.."today shalt thou be with me in paradise"

It is the same with us today.. Christ is there for us...

All we need to do is Come unto Him..

Once we truly do that we will be the repentant type of person we need to be

Turning our lives over to the Savior and becoming as He is..

That is what the atonement is about..

Becoming a little better each day...

As we turn to Christ we too can be with Him in paradise!

Happy Easter!

Wow it has been a long time since I updated this..

I tend to get distracted pretty easy! I always just find new blogs to read

or things to do..

Lately I have had a lot on my mind..

I have been swamped with school and work, it seems so overwhelming at times

but it will all be worth it someday!

I don't really know what to think or do about a few current situations that I have recently became apart of.

Sometimes I just wish I had all the answers! Wouldn't that be nice!

I just wish that I knew the next step I am supposed to/need to take.

I know what I want but I am not sure how to make it happen!

This post a realize is incredibly random but that is honestly how my thoughts have been these past few weeks especially today..

I wish I just knew what other people thought or how other peoples minds work..

I do however have a few things to look forward to

Spring Break~The first week of April...

I am going to LA and Vegas..

Disneyland~ The first weekend in May

Summer Vacation!~ May 27th is the last day of school!!!

hmmmm and hopefully a few other adventures!

November 7

I am so thankful to be a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

I know that the gospel is what brings me happiness.

I know that by following the teachings of the gospel that I can become a much better person.

I know that we are led by a living prophet today, President Thomas S. Monson.

I know that Jesus Christ lives and that He loves me and you!

I know that there is power is prayer and in the atonement.

I am grateful for the Book of Mormon.

I know that the book is true!

I love the gospel!

Want to know more???

www.mormon.org

Thankfulness

I love this time of year!! I love the fall and the holiday season

Last year, for each day of November I listed something that I am grateful for.

But since I was in The Bahamas last week (pics to come) I need to back up and name a few things.

November 1st

I am so thankful for the change in seasons. I love how we have each season in Idaho and the beauty each one brings!

November 2nd

I am thankful for vacations! I love how nice it is to visit other places. It is so amazing to see other cultures and the beautiful scenery that is around.

November 3rd

This goes along with vacations, I am so thankful to come home. It is such a blessing that I have a warm place to come to. I have amazing roommates and friends here in Idaho Falls.

November 4th

I am so thankful for funny moments in life.

I love the little moments each day that just me laugh!

I can't imagine a day without laughter!

November 5th

I am thankful for cozy blankets!

Is there really anything better then a cozy blanket on a cold day??

November 6th

I am thankful late night talks with friends.

I love that we can just stay up way to late

and laugh or cry or both!

I am grateful for those great little moments!

STRESSING!!!!!!

Wow, it has sure been one of those weeks!! So instead of having a giant meltdown I decided to just blog it hahaha..

Don't worry it will end happy...

I have been so stessed about grad school.. I have SO much to do and it never ends!

Really it is a TON of work.. By next week here is a portions of what I have to do

only watch about 10 lectures

2 videos

2 video forum posts

3 readings

3 papers on readings

Language development chart from 0-60 months

speech sample analysis

quizzes

and thats just the beginning!

Brittany and I started Book of Mormon Challenge a month ago.. Yup already behind..

I have so many IEP's for work to write/ attend..

Plus a ton of therapy to plan..

I have to attend ISHA Thurs and Friday..

I just feel so unfocused!! I can't get anything done..

Today I was hoping to get a lot accomplished but

that is not happening. I swear everything goes

right over my head... AHHHHHHHHH

I just need time to stop even for a few hours

or at least disappear for a few hours...

Anything to clear my mind!!!

Now for the things that are getting me through..

Great Roomies/friends to let me have giant meltdown..

31 days until the BAHAMAS... yep you read right.. Michelle and I are leaving town..

That will be a much needed vacation..

Amanda being postive about her crappy day today...

Institute Runs haha ;)

Dinner tonight with Chris, Michelle, and Aimee..

General Conference Weekend..

Fishing with my dad (hopefully)

....

Confession...

I didn't escape the meltdown....

hahahaha

P.S.

I know its not fall yet but I loved this background.. for

Plus I am ready fall...

I have had some amazing adventures since my last post.

I got to help out with Extreme Home Makeover

I went night canoeing in Island Park

Swimming in Yellowstone

Lagoon

Officially started grad school

Sleep over with Jacie

Pranks might have been pulled

Started back to work

Laughed a ton

Cried a little

Started a Book of Mormon challenge with my sister

Nacho party

Lava camping trip

In other words I have so many posts to do..

Hopefully tomorrow and Sunday I'll be able to post some pics!

Lessons Learned....

I was recently told that I need to update my blog more often! I have lots of fun summer pictures that will come hopefully this week.

Today however a lot has been on my mind the past few weeks so I thought I'd share.

Some are thoughts ...some are lessons learned.. some are new goals...

1) I am very blessed... I have some amazing friends

2) My Savior knows me and knows what I need

3) Even when you truly look for the good in others sometimes people will still tear you down, but it is still my choice on how to react

4) Patience is a Godly virtue, is more than just waiting, it's waiting well.

5) I can love people who are not easy to love!

6) Being impatient is a form of selfishness.

7) It is at times when we try to really improve our lives, that satan attacks us more

8) Change is a good thing..

9) Good friends never stop being your friend.

10) Seeds you plant whether good or bad are the fruits you bear.

11) Though sometimes it's hard to be nice or to bite your tongue it is well worth it.

12) Trials give us two choices to become more like our Savior or more like the adversary.

13) Tender mercies are everywhere, we just have to look.

14) Don't sweat the small stuff....

15) It's all small stuff..

16) The temple really is a place of refuge...

17) My family is absolutely amazing..

18) A simple "Thank You" when sincere can go a long way.

I am so grateful for those people who inspire me to be better. I am thankful for new friendships and old friendships. I am thankful for lessons learned even they hurt at the time. I am thankful for the truth I know because of the gospel. I am thankful for th atonement and how when applied it can heal sadness and pain. I love my life and where I am at now.

The biggest lesson and one of my many mottos is

COME WHAT MAY AND LOVE IT!

P.S. Happy May

Welcome spring..

The smells are back..

Thunderstorms..

Backyard BBQ's

Buds Blossoming

Isn't it wonderful!